07 March 2008

Verifuni Dafinations


Gail Slaughter sent these in:

INTAXICATION: Tax refund euphoria (until you realize it was your money to start with).
REINTARNATION: When you die and come back as a hillbilly.
BOZONE: The substance around idiots which prevents the penetration of bright ideas.
FOREPLOY: Strategy for picking up a partner in a bar.
CASHTRATION: Buying a house and being rendered financially impotent. Indefinitely.
GIRAFFITI: Vandalism, spray-painted very, very high.
SARCHASM: The gulf between sarcastic wit and the goof who just doesn't get it.
INOCULATTE: To take coffee intravenously.
HIPATITIS: Being terminally cool.
OSTEOPORNOSIS: A degenerate's disease. (Think about it awhile: you'll get it)
KARMAGEDDON: It's like, you know, like all these dudes are sending out all these negative vibes, man, right? And then like the earth explodes!
DECAFALON: Getting through the day without that afternoon coffee break.
GLIBIDO: All talk, no action.
DOPELER EFFECT: Stupid ideas seeming smarter if they come at you fast enough.
ARACHNOLEPTIC FIT: What you throw when you catch a spider web in the face.
BEELZEBUG: That satanic mosquito that gets in your tent and won't be cast out.
CATERPALLOR: The color you turn when you find HALF a worm in your apple.
IGNORANUS: A person both stupid and a real pain in your rear!

(source: Washington Post, Mensa Invitational)

Can you pick the winner that year?
Give your best guessed guest guess in a comment!

4 comments:

ImperfectNerd said...

All these remind me so much of the old "Boy's Life" Magazine quips on their joke page. I think they called them "Daffynitions". The one I remember best (because it somehow hit my funny bone just right) was: INTENSE: Where Boy Scouts sleep. I laughed so hard I spilled a Coke all over the floor!

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

ha ha ha, I didn't get the thing about osteopornosis because I suffer from sarchasm.

ImperfectNerd said...

Actually, I think I might be suffering the pangs of reintarnation because I didn't understand any of them!

bluerose9062 said...

LOL! These are very funny, but I laughed harder at the last 2 comments!

I think osteopornosis won.